Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Bad Boyfriend Jesus Is All That and a Bag of (Organic) Chips

The other day a friend on FB "liked" a photo from Jesus Daily. Apparently, this is what Jesus looks like:
Good Lord! (No pun intended.) Well, hello, Mister Christian.

Listen, stop making Jesus hot. It confuses me.

And, anyway, Jesus was not hot, people. He did not have gorgeous, Pantene-commercial hair. He did not look like you just ran into him at the farmer's market where he sells organic vegetables from his urban farm. He did not look like you bumped into him at the local brewing company and he turned to you and said, all cool and casual, "What's up?" And then you started picturing yourself living some cool, pseudo-hippie lifestyle with him and his dog and his carpentry workshop out back. Oh yeah, he works with wood. Yeah, he does.

No. Stop it.

Jesus was not hot.

But Bad Boyfriend Jesus is.

#sacrilicious

8 comments:

  1. I need my Bad Boyfriend Jesus to bathe...I'm funny that way. And the one we speak of fondly in church every Sunday may have been washing other peoples feet....but doesn't sound like a very big bather.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bad Boyfriend Jesus doesn't need deodorant. He bathes in the Holy Spirit.

      Delete
  2. Too funny! But who am I to talk? See my post "Did Jesus Have a Wife?"
    http://www.tkthorne.wordpress.com

    ReplyDelete
  3. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am totally convinced that Jesus was hot, but I don't like him depicted that way in movies, posters, etc. For example, I was totally distracted in The Passion of the Christ because of hot Jesus. And since I'm actually Christian this was especially difficult to deal with.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Bad Boyfriend Jesus must have some serious muscle definition if he works with wood. Can you say six-pack?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm imagining this now.
      Uh, this seems wrong.
      I'm so conflicted!

      Delete

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